Why I Love This Season (and it’s not because of pumpkin spice lattes)
Right now we are almost through September. The leaves are slowly starting to change. The air is getting crisper (although here in Virginia we still have humid days). The kids are back in school. All the pumpkin spice stuff is available if that’s your thing. I have been thinking about all the cozy, comforting foods that go along with fall and football season. Whether you love it or not – and oh, do I love it – fall is here!
For me, fall also brings college application season. Right now I am living it both personally and professionally since my son is in his senior year of high school. I love supporting students in putting their best foot forward when packaging their application materials. Brainstorming and workshopping essay topics is my favorite. I love the satisfaction of landing on an essay idea that completely speaks from their unique voice and perspective. I also love organizing and checklists, making sure every “i” is dotted and every “t” is crossed on their application.
What I notice most during this time in the parents and students I talk to, is there are vastly different levels of preparedness, and subsequently, vastly different levels of stress and anxiety. Some teens know exactly what they want to major in, know exactly where they want to apply, and they make their own checklists, attacking everything head on. But in my experience, this is rare. Most teens I talk to have no idea what they want to do. They might say they want to go to a certain college, but mainly because they know about it through family and friends, not because they have put any thought or research into the decision. They simply pick something because they think that’s what they “should” be doing.
Because most students don’t really know what they want to do, they avoid the topic, roll their eyes when you ask them about it, or yell at you. It’s stressful for them and it’s stressful for you. They feel a lot of pressure from everywhere. You want to help them, but they see it as adding to their already stressful situation. I want to help them shut out all the noise and really hone in on what they want and not what everyone tells them they “should” do.
If you are reading this as a parent of a High School Freshman, Sophomore or Junior, you might be thinking you have plenty of time – and you do. But waiting until the beginning of senior year to start thinking about it is more stressful. Sure, If you wait you can still organize everything and apply on time, but starting early allows for lots of exploration on careers, college campuses, extracurriculars, community service, and more. Not with the intent of locking them into any decisions, but creating in them a curiosity for all of the possibilities. Engaging in the process early allows you to build their resume of experiences that tell their unique story. This will make the application season less stressful.
Sure, if your teen is organized and on top of things, you can absolutely support them in applying to college without the support of a professional. But I know in my house, even though this is what I do as my profession, it is pulling teeth to get my son to write his essay. He rolls his eyes at me whenever I ask him questions like “Did you open a College App account?” “How does your school handle transcripts?” It’s stressful for even me!
So what I offer is simple. Peace of mind. I offer the checklists and timelines to keep your child organized so you don’t have to nag them (because we all know nagging doesn’t work). This is a big time of transition for you and your child. They are entering the world of adulthood and we have to let them try it out. Your relationship with them will evolve through this process. Hiring a professional allows you to maintain some semblance of peace with your child through this overwhelming time by letting me be the one to ask the tough questions and support them through the process.
